Royal Dublin Fusiliers Memorial

Oh, to be in Dublin now that nollaig’s here,

So I went, two days before Christmas.

Sunny and cold – my favourite weather. Some like it hot, others not. SWMBO says I’m a dog.

How can I tell its not England?

Well of course, there’s euro and speed limits in kilometres and elegant Georgian architecture and the green, white, orange trídhathach na hÉireann.

Ah sure, don’t waste my time: you’d expect them. Anything else?

Ermmm. Well now, let’s see.

• Lots and lots of young people.
• Lots of well-dressed people.
• People from all over the world, some visiting, some at home here.
• Happy looking families, you know, mum, dad, girls, boys.

Hang on a minute, you can’t say that. It contravenes woke gender fluidity stereotype laws.

Feck off.

• Street corner flower sellers.
• Cheerful faces.
• Healthy faces.
• Clean streets.
• No really fat people. Haven’t seen a single one.
• No people on mobility scooters. Haven’t seen a single one.

In Dublin now.